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Counselor's Corners 2008-2009
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May 2009 Drops or Drips? What does your child (ren) experience? Perhaps you are hearing your child (ren) say, “That was a drop!” or “That was a drip!” What they are referring to is from our guidance lessons on Have You Filled a Bucket Today? The lessons are based on a book with the same title written by Carol McCloud. The premise of “the bucket theory” was first shared by Donald Clifton in the 1960’s. Author McCloud expresses the bucket theory well in the book’s introduction saying: “The bucket represents a child’s mental and emotional health. You can’t see the bucket, but it’s there.” She went on to say that “it is primarily the parents’ or other caregivers’ responsibility to fill a child’s bucket. When you hold, caress, nurture, touch, sing, play and provide loving attention, safety and care, you fill your child’s bucket.” This is not just for babies but for all of us, whether we are tall or short people. Giving love fills buckets and it needs to be done on a daily basis. However, in addition to being loved, children must also be taught how to love others. The children who learn how to express kindness and love, lead happier lives. When we love, care about others and show that love with what we say and do, we feel good and it fills our own bucket too! Bucket filling are the drops of kind statements that we, tall people as well, receive throughout each day. But when a negative comment and thought is said, the drips begin to empty the buckets of our friends, family, acquaintances and ourselves. It is so important that we model bucket filling by telling others that what they say or do is special to you. Practice this with your child (ren) daily and watch how quickly a sense of joy and pride takes hold. Check out the website www.bucketfillers101.com for more information. Additionally, the adult version of this is How Full is Your Bucket: Positive Strategies for Work and Life by Roth and Clifton. It’s a quick read and will provide insights into how this “bucket filling affects all of our relationships, health, safety and productivity. Thank you for sharing your children with us this year! I wish all of you a safe and happy summer! See you in the fall! Liz Brewer, School Counselor April 2009 The Importance of Teaching Feelings Caring about others is essential for a healthy community and society. It reflects our belief that every person is valuable. It also brings us satisfaction if we can understand our feelings and understand why we and others behave as we do. During the past month the students have been discussing what feelings we all experience and how we deal with those emotions. It is usually easy to talk about being “happy” and we often blurt out that we are “mad!” But it is important for the students to develop a vocabulary of feeling words so they are able to express their emotions and to understand everyone else has feelings too. Here are some suggestions of how to talk about feelings with your child(ren). - Encourage your child(ren) to name his/her feelings and talk about it.
- When your child(ren) expresses a feeling, listen attentively. Don’t say he/she should not feel that way. (If a child is angry, accept the angry feeling but limit the acting out of it.)
- Use stories and books to illustrate others’ feelings. Ask questions like: What is the character feeling? How can you tell? Have you ever felt that way? How did you get to feel better? What did the character do to feel better?
- Share instances from your life when you felt scared, lonely, hurt, etc. and how you were able to deal with the feeling.
- Use puppets or role play how others deal with their feelings.
- Show children through your own listening and sharing that they too can help others work through some of their feelings.
We as adults are the role models for our children who are constantly watching and listening. And the care and response we show to others as they are expressing their feelings will better equip our children to understand and express their own feelings. Finally it shows we value them and how they feel. March 2009 It’s That Time of Year Again The school calendar is reminding us that the PSSA’s are on their way for our 3rd and 4th grades. If you are reading this and your child(ren) is not in these 2 upper grades, you have time to work on the following areas for student success in test taking. Standardized tests as in our Commonwealth’s PSSA tests are common today and will continue to be on your child(ren)’s school calendar until graduation and the stakes of these tests are high. These tests measure student achievement, indicate what skills students need to improve, how to design lessons to raise academic performance and evaluate a school’s performance. There are several helpful tips for helping your child(ren) feel confident, well-prepared and ready to do well on these test days. 1. Attendance makes a difference. Research has shown over and over again that regular school attendance results in significant test scores gains. 2. Good health is important. A nutritious breakfast every morning gives students body and brain energy. 3. A regular sleep routine is essential. Most children need at least 8 hours of sleep each night. 4. Exercise every day is important as it increases oxygen to the brain and helps with thinking and memory. 5. Children who read well are more likely to succeed in school and on standardized tests. Practice, practice, practice is so important. And as the saying goes, “Only read on those days that we eat!” 6. If your child(ren) is prone to test anxiety, give him or her the following suggestions: a. Read the directions very carefully! b. Don’t be afraid to skip a question and then come back to it later. c. Don’t cram. d. Don’t panic. e. Breathe, breathe, breathe. f. Remember past tests where you did well and you can do it again! Life continues to be busy for all of us and yet these very simple and basic tips can help to prepare our students to do their best on the PSSA’s 2009! Ms. Brewer
February 2009 Family Fridays There is a new initiative underway that is making national news. It is called “Family Fridays” and it makes a lot of sense. The idea is centered around gathering the family together on a Friday evening after a week of rushing from one activity to another, often doing things separately. The Family Friday evening meal would then set the tone for the upcoming weekend. Creating such an event certainly will take some energy, some changes and persistence. The adults in the home will set the stage by telling the children that this will be a good time to sit, laugh, and talk with one another. It cannot be an “eat and run” meal but a time of at least 45 minutes to one hour. Eventually the time would incease as the family begins to experience the special bonding. It will be important to eliminate distractions during the dinner together. Cell phones, computer, TV, etc. all need to be turned off, including ignoring the landline phone if it rings during the meal. Children will realize they have their parents’ undivided attention. What a special gift to give to them! The obligations that will sneak into this plan need to be handled firmly and scheduled around the Family Friday meal. And by the way, it could also be Together Thursdays,Tuesdays or Magic Mondays. Children will buy into the experience and enjoy it even more if they have responsibilities for this special meal. Let them help set the table, clear the table, make name cards or fold the napkins. Encourage them to come to dinner with a special topic or question. Be willing to share your day and give them the opportunity to share their day with you! From time to time a special guest or relative may be “invited in” to this Family Friday gathering. This is a simple tradition that used to be a daily mainstay of families across our nation. Now because of the fast-pace of our lives, we need to work it into our family’s schedules for even one meal per week. But oh, it is so worth it! Good luck. Let me know how it goes! Happy Valentine’s Month! Ms. Brewer, School Counselor
January 2009 Happy New Year! Early this morning as I was eating my cereal, I was watching on C-SPAN the confirmation hearing for the new Secretary of Education, Arne Duncan, from Illinois who had been the CEO of the schools in Chicago. He talked about the importance of having high expectations for students all the way through their school career. He said that we need to drive children to do their best and to take advantage of all the opportunities out there which certainly is a challenge to all of us every day. During the conversation between the Secretary-elect Duncan and the Confirmation Committee the discussion included the fact that in the early middle school years students begin to either “check in” or “check out” of school, meaning that they either buy into the importance of doing well in school or they just put in their time until the time that they can leave. One of the senators talked about elementary students needing to realize that they have the opportunity and the ability to go to college after they complete high school. They all agreed that due to the prices of higher education that more emphasis needs to be placed on making college more affordable and that graduates leave with out high debt. Now, the good news is because you have children in the elementary there will be time for the government to have this financial dilemma straightened out by the time your child’s freshman year of college begins. However, what is extremely important at this stage of the game is that we help children recognize that school needs to be everyone’s number one top priority in the family! I too often hear children who are mesmerized by their video games, their Wii, their sports, and yet I do not hear as much excitement from them when they talk about their family time of reading and writing together. Senator Harkin from Iowa who has been a long supporter of education stated that in the new leadership of our country we have to recognize that our country will be defined by who we are by giving our children the best education that we can in this land of opportunity. So, as we ring in this new year of 2009 and the numerous changes facing us as a country, as a family, and as individuals lets work together to give our children here at Turbotville Elementary School the best possible education so that they can follow their dreams. Liz Brewer, School Counselor December 2008 Holiday Greetings! Here it is this time of the year again and many of us feel hard pressed as to what gift to buy for gram, sis, step-dad, neighbor Joe, etc., etc., etc. The dilemma is where do we find all the money to purchase all of these gifts besides the gifts that we share with our children? I have been doing a lot of listening to Jean Chatzky, America’s favorite money coach. She talks a lot about how families need to stretch the money that they do have for all the necessities and then those extra things that we all think we need! I have found her advice really no nonsense and beneficial. In her latest column she states, “Times are tough - and that can put a financial strain on the entire family. Learn how to say no and how to teach kids a lesson that will last a life time.” She has made available 3 excellent articles that I think any parent could benefit from: “Teach kids how to give”, “How kids feel about the economic crisis”, and “Why giving them everything isn’t worth it.” I hope you check out the website at www.oprah.com/subtopic/money/parentsandkids . (I will be glad to share a copy of any of these articles if you have difficulty accessing this website.) My sincere wishes to each of you and your families for a peaceful and happy holiday. Liz Brewer, School Counselor November 2008 Last week in our Guidance classes we were talking about school bus safety in observance of National School Bus Safety Week. We were discussing what a RESPONSIBLE student does on the school bus. I shared with the children that I thought being a bus driver was the second hardest job in the world and being a parent was the toughest job on this planet. I shared that even being the President of the United States would not be as hard or have as many responsibilities connected with it! So, I salute each of you as parent, stepparent, adoptive parent, foster parent, grandparent, etc. I think about you when I go grocery shopping and when I go to the gas pumps for my car. I have been reading about the financial chaos on all of us, particularly on families. I also believe the news media makes us even more frenzied about the state of affairs! I did read in one article that we all need to take a lot of deep breaths and to speak and remain as calm as possible for the sake of the children. We expect so much of them with our hectic lifestyles. And now we add another heavy issue to their young lives. As we move towards another holiday season in the midst of this dilemma, we need to look for ways on how we can “gift” the children without giving them the expensive material toys, etc. So, I am asking each of you to think of ways that we can show our love and honor to our little people with meaningful gifts that cost nothing or relatively little. Will you drop me a note, call me, or email* your ideas of doing less money/material gifts this season and more creative ways to say “I love you” to the children? I will post these ideas as they come up on the Guidance Webpage under The Counselor’s Corner. Hopefully we will have a healthy list that will evolve into a beautiful season of joy. Let’s see if we can figure things out together. That saying, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” by Dickens could define our current state of affairs. Let’s reach out and help one another with ideas to lessen the anxiety this time of year brings and the extra burdens in 2008! Hoping to hear from you. Thank you! Liz Brewer, School Counselor * Please type in lbrewer@wrsd.org. For some reason going to the Warrior Run Home Page and clicking on staff websites does not get to me! October 2008 Counselor’s Corner THIS YEAR… RESPONSIBILITY For the past several years a character word has been highlighted each year in our guidance classroom. We started with RESPECT, then COMPASSION. Last year our word that was interwoven throughout our class work and discussions was KINDNESS. Our character word this year that will be highlighted in our lessons is RESPONSIBILITY. As tall people we know that responsibilities are the jobs, duties and obligations that make up a large part of our lives. Parents and adults agree that they want their children to develop into responsible people but learning the value of responsibility does not take place overnight or as a result of any one event. It is a process where we need to encourage our children to be responsible for themselves, to their family, neighbors, and teachers. We need to show them how to be responsible not just within our world but to society as a whole. The way to do this is for consistent guidance in everyday tasks and in the role modeling that we share with them minute by minute. Surveys of educational leaders consistently list “Building responsibilities in students” as one of the most important things adults can do to improve student learning. But how do we do that? Let’s begin with the morning routine. · Encourage children to pack up their backpacks the night before and show them where to place it in one area so they can just slip it on as they go out the door. · Decide together the night before what they will wear to school. · As consistently as possible have a routine bedtime, allowing for 8 – 9 hours of good sleep. · Awaken them at the same time each morning and have an established chart of routine tasks to get themselves ready. · Have a nutritious breakfast whether it be a sit down time or a healthy bite on the run. · Supervision of morning vitamins and other medicines is crucial. (Our children have enough other things to be responsible for!) These are just a few simple yet very important responsibilities that we as adults need to establish in the morning order to show our children that even though we live in a frantic world, we value them and their time. And because of that we will be responsible and use our time to establish this important morning routine. Let me know if you would like more ideas and tips on how to build responsibility in your children. Happy Fall, Liz Brewer September 2008 Counselor’s Corner Brains, Bikes, Backpacks, and Breakfasts We are off to a bright and exciting 2008 – 09 school year. The halls at Turbotville Elementary School look colorful with all the primary colors. As I begin my developmental guidance classes with the children, we talk about what it is like to be a good listener. Using our puppet friend, Bucky the Beaver, we discuss “that eyes are for watching the teacher, ears are for listening to the teacher, hands and feet are still and quiet, mouth is closed and brain is thinking and focusing.” When I talk about the brain and how important it is to our bodies, we inevitably talk about why we need to protect our heads with helmets. The children are very aware of the times they should have these helmets on their heads for their bike riding, roller blading, riding on their scooter, and on skateboards, etc. I was surprised however, to find out that even though they may have helmets, they do not wear them. I have noticed that many of the children have new and shiny backpacks.<SPAN style="mso-spac
School Counseling at the Elementary Schools
Warrior Run School District
Turbotville ES, 301 Pine Street,Turbotville, PA 17772
Watson ES, 1100 Main Street, Watsontown, PA 17777
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