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Counselor's Corners 2009-2010
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April /May 2010 POSSIBILITES AND OPPORTUNITIES Part VII Life is a journey! Most of us as adults understand this concept. We also realize that the happy, fun and joyous times are easy to talk about and to live through. On the other hand, those devastating and sad times, like a death of a family member, neighbor or even a family pet are difficult to handle and to navigate. So far this year I have noted that 23 of our children at Turbotville Elementary School have experienced a death of a loved one. (These are the ones that I know about.) Out of that group, 8 have had multiple losses. Even though they may not say too much during this sad and stressful time, they are thinking and watching. Research shows children hold certain myths about death if they are not given developmentally appropriate information. Some of the most common are: death in contagious just like colds; “I must be strong and not cry”; “dead people can hear and see me”; death is a long sleep; and “____died and it’s my fault!” There are opportunities to assist children at these times. Over the years the children who have been involved in memory groups in our guidance room come away with a better understanding of the emotions they experience and a memory booklet of their loved one(s) that they have personally created. Additionally resource books that are age-appropriate can be shared with the family so they can read them together. During the month of May, Camp Courage is held for a weekend on the grounds of Camp Victory in Millville. This camp is free of charge for children ages 8-16. Over the years we have had many children attend this camp experience. Families have found it to be a great source of comfort and relief. Please contact me if I can be of assistance to you and/or your child(ren) when traveling through this part of life. Sincerely, Liz Brewer School Counselor February/ March 2010 Teachable Moments Part VI “No matter where we live, no matter how careful we might be, Mother Nature has a habit of intruding in our lives. Tornadoes, earthquakes, hurricanes, fires and floods can happen at any time, without much warning. When they do, they send us on an emotional roller coaster ride.”* Within minutes of the Haiti earthquake, my friend and professional colleague, Cheri Lovre, posted a message on her website of how we as tall people, who love, care and interact with the short people in our own part of the world can deal with all the media attention of this horrific crisis. She stated, “One of the greatest gifts we can be at these times is to take a deep breath, create space and give students the opportunity to talk about what they have heard and how they are feeling in the response to this event. This is an opportunity to talk to children about empathy.” This is the “teachable moment” of how we can as a family unit, group of friends or community organization reach out to the people of Haiti by contributing financially to the Red Cross, UNICEF, or other reputable organizations providing assistance. The amount of donation is not the focus, but rather the act of caring and reaching out to others in need speaks volumes to our short people! Additionally, it is a “safer time” for us as tall people to have discussions about what we would do in a crisis, by having an emergency kit in our home and car, by having practice drills in our home and for allowing time to listen to the children about their fears and concerns. Certainly this can be unsettling for us as adults but we owe it to our children to prepare, communicate and address feelings and concerns. I highly recommend Cheri’s website at www.info@cmionline.org and also the book* entitled, I’ll Know What to Do; A Kid’s Guide to Natural Disasters by Mark and Layton. (There is a copy of this book in the guidance office.) It is a teachable moment for all of us! Liz Brewer Possibilities and Opportunities January 2010 Part V Happy New Year! This was the opening of our guidance class discussions as we started back to school on January 4th. We talked about the meaning of having a new opportunity to set goals to try to do things better in 2010. Among the children’s’ (short peoples’) responses were: I want to do better in spelling. I want to master my math facts. I want to travel someplace I’ve never been to. I want to read 10 books a month. I want to be a better friend. I want to learn how to play basketball. I want to try not having fights with my brother. We, as tall people have new opportunities to earnestly and sincerely praise our short people. I recently came across a new list of phrases that focus on kindness and acceptance: You can be trusted. Great discovery! You tried hard! What a good listener. You’re so kind. I believe in you. Thanks for being honest. You’ve earned my respect. Thanks for helping. You are loved. Thanks for caring. Let me know how these statements impact you and your children. Best wishes as we begin a new decade. Liz Brewer Possibilities & Opportunities December 2009 Part IV “The Art of Giving” Things are different! Everywhere we turn we are being challenged by changes. Bills are rising, jobs are being reduced or lost and yet life goes on, and here it is, the holiday season when we are all being bombarded by advertisements everywhere to buy this and buy that and give, give, give. During guidance classes this month we are taking a look at “the art of giving” and how we can do this with the resources we have. One perception of giving will be found in our reading of Shel Silverstein’s classic book, The Giving Tree. In this story the faithful tree offers itself over and over to its friend in return for love and acceptance. We will also spend time talking about Penny’s Christmas Jar Miracle written by Jason Wright. It is a story about Penny’s family whose custom of throwing their lose change into the glass jar throughout the year turns into a wonderful family tradition during this season. Please ask your child(ren) how the Paisley Family Christmas Jar became a wonderful gift for ….. In my reading and watching, I have found some wonderful “seeds” that can be planted for all of us to grow and prosper. One activity that I have observed is seeing more families going together to the local library or bookstore at the mall and sitting and gently reading books. What a great way to be together during this holiday season! While at the bookshelves, spend some time with a book, Living and Loving Out Loud. It contains a real profound statement that could be the best gift of all. “Parenting is . . . . . showing up and being present (for our children)!” Another book to check out is entitled Children Who Soar which discusses how we need to let children experience failure in a safe environment in order to be more socially and emotionally secure as they get older. I have also observed that some Turbotville families travel to Disney World. There is a new promotion of “Giving a Day (volunteering) and Getting a Disney Day.” It is their way of “giving” one million people in 2010, children and grownups, a day at the park. More information can be found at www.disney.com. So whether it’s a trip to the bookstore or to Disney or just a special sharing time at home, embrace the “art of giving” of our real selves to one another! Season’s Greetings, Liz Brewer P.S. Here is a great quote from Mark Reasner that I heard he said during parent-teacher conferences. I quote him with his permission. It would make a great New Year’s Resolution. “Parenting is a contact sport. Tighten your chin strap, put your pads on, stretch out and go out there – it’s game time!” Possibilities & Opportunities November 2009 Part III Parenting is recognized as being the hardest job a person can ever have! It seems as though when one problem is solved, there are more dilemmas and situations in the wings to take its place. I recently came upon a stash of short parenting articles that give practical suggestions for problems often encountered by parents. · “When Your Child Gets Rejected . . . . it can be tough.” · “Stop Hassling Me: Breaking the Cycle of Bullying” · “I Will Never Know Why” by Susan Klebold · “More Tests = More Anxiety” · The Jonas Brothers’ Mom shares her down to earth parenting style. If you are interested in any or all of these, let me know and I would be glad to send a copy (ies) to you. Last month the Public Broadcasting Service premiered an “Arthur” story for children entitled “The Great MacGrady.” It is of a collaboration between PBS, LiveSTRONG and the mission to help families talk with children about cancer. Lance Armstrong states, “I know how important it is to find a way to talk with kids about cancer that is age-appropriate, hopeful, inspiring and empowering.” There is an accompanying booklet that is available on line. I would also be glad to share a copy with you. Throughout our guidance classes since the beginning of school, we have talked about how to be a successful school student. In our conversations we discuss that whenever we go we need to “Take a little space, Make it a better place, For you, for me And the entire human race.” Thanksgiving Wishes to you and your family as we make our spaces better places. Sincerely, Liz Brewer Possibilities & Opportunities October 2009 Part II Once again there are possibilities and opportunities out there to help us navigate through these fast-paced changes that we need to make in our daily lives. The first opportunity has been done as a collaboration between Elmo on Sesame Street and Jean Chatzey, financial expert on the Today Show. Families Stand Together is the spearhead of putting together ways families can raise healthy and emotionally secure children during tough economic times. In this presentation which can be found on You Tube at www.sesameworkshop.org/toughtimes it gives children perspective on how finances affect their families. Another opportunity out there that I recently found out about from colleagues and attending the National Book Festival in Washington, D.C. was the excitement children are experiencing in reading the series of books entitled, 39 Clues. It is a collection of 10 books 5 of which are now in print that give young readers opportunities to learn about different countries while trying to solve a quest that was given to them by their deceased grandmother. After the children read a book they can then go on line to view an accompanying video that will continue to give more clues to the puzzle. And finally, Family Fridays continues to be a mission of having families across the United States turn off their computers and their active lives to be with one another to enjoy a meal, a story, a game, or just time together to talk. It is being said that a house is just a place where we find TV’s, computers, fancy cars, and other gadgets and the home is where we experience the intangibles which include smiles, music, and the smell of our favorite dish cooking on the stove. Let me know what you think of this series of possibilities and opportunities. Sincerely, Liz Brewer Possibilities & Opportunities September 2009 Part I What an exciting time of the year! A new school year filled with possibilities and opportunities. As the school counselor, I am here to assist the children, parents and teachers in any way that I can for the well-being of the children at Turbotville Elementary School. There are 5 expectations expressed by the American School Counselors Association of how the role of the school counselor can connect with parents so children can have a successful school year. These can be accessed at www.schoolcounselor.org/backtoschooltips. If you would like a hard copy of the “back to school tips,” please let me know and I will send you a copy of these possibilities. Other suggested websites for children having a successful year are: Kids Health: Going back to school for kids http://kidshealth.org/kid/feeling/school/back to school.html First gov.gov: Back to School http://www.firstgov.gov/Topics/Back to School.html National Safety Council: Back to School Safety Tips http://www.nsc.org/mem/youth/8 school.htm One of the major areas of my “work” with the children is that of understanding and expressing their feelings. Here in the Susquehanna Valley on Saturday evening, October 1st at 7 P.M. till 8:30 P.M. we can hear John Grogan, the author of the best seller, Marley & Me at Susquehanna University in Selinsgrove. So many of our children either read and/ or saw the book/movie. This would be an excellent opportunity to have discussion with your child(ren) about happy and sad times. Additionally, Montgomery House Library in McEwensville (538-1381) is offering a wonderful array of special opportunities to both tall and short people in our community. The Watson Theatre will be showing the “Marley & Me” movie on Thursday evening at 7 P.M. on September 24th. Again as the year ramps up, our children will be carrying their backpacks to and from school. There is a practical guide on how we can lessen the chance of “our short people” developing strained muscles and joints and back pain caused by packs that are too heavy or carried incorrectly found at: www.kidhealth.org/parent/positive/learning/backpack.html. Again, I’d be glad to share a paper copy; just let me know. Please visit my website throughout the year for other opportunities and possibilities to help our children have a successful, productive and HAPPY 2009 – 10. Sincerely,
Liz Brewer
School Counseling at the Elementary Schools
Warrior Run School District
Turbotville ES, 301 Pine Street,Turbotville, PA 17772
Watson ES, 1100 Main Street, Watsontown, PA 17777
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